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Real beauties and beasts (Part II of II)

The team concentrated on makes and models from recent years (nothing 10 years or older). To begin, we’ll start with the ugly fuglies of the bunch. Coming in at number 5 is the 2016 Ford Kuga Vignale. The name alone is monstrous, and viewers find this car the same. The front grille is Kia-esque, but the lines are way too boxy making the Vignale a real eyesore. Number 4 was the 2015 Audi RS7 Sportback. Your scribe is one that likes this Audi, but it understandably departed from the typical Audi lines and that is likely why it was voted so low. As a stand-alone car it’s not ugly, but for Audi, perhaps.

Number 3 is sadly another Audi – the 2012 A1 Sportback. There’s a theory here – when Audi departs from its principal styling, customers buck back. Maybe, but this hatchback is not that attractive for any brand, Audi or no Audi. The number 2 ugliest car on the block is the 2019 Mercedes-AMG GLC Coupe, a mix of off-road, mini-SUV styling and traditional Mercedes lines. The result – auto vomit. And the number 1 ugly duckling on the block, the car with a hair-lip, crossed eyes, hairy ears and a giant gut … the 2013 Ford Fiesta ST. Don’t google it, you’ll upchuck on your Nikes. The Fiesta in general has been dubbed unimaginative, but the 2013 version is just plain gross. Odd proportions are everywhere, and marketed as a hot hatch, the Fiesta is simply a hot mess.

Now that we’ve dispatched with the nasty guys and gals, let’s get to the pretty folks (subjectively speaking of course). The number 5 most attractive ride is the 2014 Nissan Micra. Can’t say this one jumped off the screen, a decent looking ride, but the number 5 best looking car? Number 4 was the 2019 Toyota Corolla. Toyota swung for the fences here, designing something entirely new … and it worked! Powerful looks with a low, yet firmly established lines, the Corolla is a definite hit. Number 3 is European centric, the 2016 Vauxhall Mokka. This is known stateside as the Buick Encore, a bubbly crossover with a short wheelbase and tall beltline. One wouldn’t think such a combination would work, but the Encore is pleasing to the eye.

The number 2 best-looking ride is the 2011 VW Up! We didn’t intend on placing the exclamation mark there. The Up! comes with an exclamation mark, so when your pronounce this car, do so accordingly! Rounded edges and very symmetrical, an odd choice for number 2, but we’ll accept it. And now, for the number 1 beauty, a car that will make you want to sell your children to buy, the 2016 Smart ForTwo Cabrio. Ok, now we know this study is a total fraud. The prettiest car in the world is the ForTwo Cabrio? According to CarWow, this car registered 98.83% conformity to the golden ratio. We want a recount!

Just as we expected, the golden ratio is far from exact science, but that won’t keep folks from testing the waters every year. Beauty is desired, and apparently desired to be studied as well.   

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